One of the biggest risks you will ever take is being real with someone. There are so many possible outcomes available, and not all of them are happy! So what are we to do?
How many times have I been in a situation, marriage relationship, girlfriends, parents, siblings, children or co-worker situation, that I wish I'd have been bold enough to be real? Too many to count! Those of you who know me personally, I'm sure are making faces of disbelief and asking when wasn't I real!?? Believe it or not, there are times that even I lack the confidence to be transparent and honest with someone because I honestly hate confrontation! Again, quit laughing!! (you know who you are, and so do I!)
Often, there are times that I have really screwed things up, and just need to say it out loud, confide in someone and let them help me through the situation. However, I am not one that likes to be wrong! I cringe at the thought of my circle of influence ever knowing that I'm afraid! Admitting failures and sins is something I'd really like to never have to do!
Guess what, I can even have trouble when it's a good thing! Can you imagine? What would be hard about saying to someone, "You make me happy." or "I like being in your space." or even "I love you."? Fear of rejection gets in the way, way too often! Now, stay with me, can you imagine being rejected by your spouse? Can you imagine being rejected by your best friend? Is it possible that your parents could ever make you feel insecure? We all know our siblings can, I mean that's what they're for! Right? It does happen, and I know, unfortunately, I've made others feel the same. *Let me take a moment here and just say that I humbly apologize to all who I have made feel rejected at any time in our relationship, and ask for your forgiveness.*
How amazing would it be for us to have the freedom to go to that one person and say it's time, and I need to be real. Each of us need an accountability partner, someone that we trust with our innermost longings, biggest failures and deepest fears. Choose wisely before opening up! How do you know who the right person is? There are a few traits that I would recommend looking for in a person before baring your soul! Here's what I look for:
1. Is she (since I'm a girl, I will only have a female accountability partner and I recommend you find someone of the same gender as yourself for yours, we are talking about an emotional entanglement, and let's be real....no pun intended....this can be tricky!!) a Christian, open about her faith and a prayer warrior?
2. Is she someone I look up to?
3. Is there wisdom in her words and actions?
4. Is she one that speaks well of others to you?
5. Is she an encourager?
6. Has God brought her into my life for this purpose? (here's where a prayer or several will come in handy! Ask God is this who I should be real with.)
There is an unimaginable amount of peace that comes when you are able to open your heart and bare your soul and just being transparent with someone. No judgement, no looks of shock or dismay, just genuine care and concern for another's well being: spiritual, emotional and physical. Am I able to be that for someone? I'm praying that God will see fit to open my heart to someone, have me become a better listener than speaker, be compassionate yet honest with no condemnation or ridicule.
It's time, friends....Get Real!
QUESTION: Is there something in your closet of skeletons that when it fell out into the open wasn't received as badly as you were afraid it would be?
Have a character building day!